Jesus Christ

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Posts by Jesus Christ

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  40

  what would jesus say if he inspected this place?

  by comforter in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  woe, woe, woe!

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  Jesus Christ

  Hey, all I know is you asked what would Jesus say if he came on this board and inspected it. If you look to the left of this post you'll see that I am Jesus and I'm answering your question. Don't be upset if you don't like it. I'll also have you know that I don't exactly appreciate you trying to put words that you may like into my mouth. You don't see me going around stating things like "Comforter says that he enjoys oral sex with goats" so please don't say that I would think anything negative about all the fine people (you not included) that post here.

  Idiot.

  Edited to add "Poop is often found in the toilet." See, I can have a clever little tag at the end of my post too.

  Edited by - Jesus Christ on 24 October 2002 3:40:22
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  31

  What would I do?

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello my children.

  there have been some posts today debating what i might say in certain situations.

  to make things easy for all of you that may have questions for how i may react or respond to certain situations i thought i would just start a thread to answer all your questions.

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  Jesus Christ

  I can start doing more concert reviews if you like!!! The guy who types this stuff out for me goes to a lot of them.

  Last was Incubus. Good live act, tight performance, great effects, wife was turned on by shirtless singer who is apparently hot, fun crowd, would definitely see again even though he's not a big fan.

  Saw Nelly not too long ago also. Show was horrible. The stage only had a stand for the DJ, no live music (all on tape), country concerts have more bass, people on stage that nobody really knew what they were doing (standing? handing out towels to performers? Nelly's friend from high school who wanted to get laid?), it was basicaly kareoke (however you spell that) with the guy who actually does the songs on stage and the lights and everything were about as good.

  Missed Paul Westerberg due to idiot stoner friend who decided to sit around and get high all day instead of go to the concert. No longer friend.

  Looking forward to Creed in a few weeks and Pearl Jam next summer.
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  105

  Please participate in my survey

  by Zechariah in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have received inquiries about how i was trained by spirit as a psychologist.

  i was led to many sources of enlightenment.

  books routinely was i led to that it was important i read.

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  Jesus Christ

  V=IR

  (Ohms law for all you non-electrical people out there)

  Does that count?
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  31

  What would I do?

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello my children.

  there have been some posts today debating what i might say in certain situations.

  to make things easy for all of you that may have questions for how i may react or respond to certain situations i thought i would just start a thread to answer all your questions.

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  Jesus Christ

  Tera,
  You wouldn't have those urges unless we were giving them to you and your hands are most certainly in the right place. Pleasure yourself all you want without any feelings of guilt knowing that dad and I are getting off on watching you, many other women, and especially Jennifer Lopez (who screams out Jeeeezus), doing the deed to themselves. We used to really enjoy watching Shirley Manson (singer from Garbage) but since she went from a glamorous and stylish type red hed to short blond punk rocker she's just not that great anymore. One of the best concerts the guy who types this out for me ever went to was when he had floor seats right up front for a Smashing Pumpkins concert that Garbage was opening. Shirley Manson + short skirt that's right about eye level when she bends down + horny teenager = pissed off girlfriend. Oh yeah, Smashing Pumpkins were great too.
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  31

  What would I do?

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello my children.

  there have been some posts today debating what i might say in certain situations.

  to make things easy for all of you that may have questions for how i may react or respond to certain situations i thought i would just start a thread to answer all your questions.

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  Jesus Christ

  Beer; no
  Vodka; yes; Smirnof

  Am I always this arrogant? Yes. Come on, I'm the savior of all mankind. One of the most popular holy books in the world is about me. I can walk on water. Jennifer Lopez calls my name out during sex. How can you not be arrogant in cases like that?

  Anybody else?
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  31

  What would I do?

  by Jesus Christ in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello my children.

  there have been some posts today debating what i might say in certain situations.

  to make things easy for all of you that may have questions for how i may react or respond to certain situations i thought i would just start a thread to answer all your questions.

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  Jesus Christ

  Hello my children.
  There have been some posts today debating what I might say in certain situations. To make things easy for all of you that may have questions for how I may react or respond to certain situations I thought I would just start a thread to answer all your questions.
  Ask any questions of me that you would like. I'm feeling chatty and am enjoying the world series (go Giants!) so I will continue to respond until I hit my limit.
  Dad bless you.

  Edited by - Jesus Christ on 23 October 2002 23:32:22
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  22

  What Would Jesus Say If He Came For Inspection?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  if jesus did come to inspect the faithful and discreet slave, what would he say?

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  Jesus Christ

  I'd say they're a bunch of morons.

  Why didn't you just ask me to begin with instead of wondering what I'd say? You mortals are so silly.
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  40

  what would jesus say if he inspected this place?

  by comforter in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  woe, woe, woe!

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  Jesus Christ

  Oh yeah, normaly I wouldn't waste my time by encouraging, or even reading, posts by trolls like this but I felt that I needed to reply to this thread because it addresses me directly and this moron is trying to put words in my mouth.
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  40

  what would jesus say if he inspected this place?

  by comforter in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  woe, woe, woe!

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  Jesus Christ

  Well, I have inspected it and most the people here are pretty decent. Some more than other but for the most part just about everyone is pretty cool.

  However, you, Comfy, are an idiot. You've seen what I think of this place now please go away.
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  35

  Witnesses ForJesus Convention!!!

  by mouthy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tom!

  you were great!!!!!

  how lovely it was to see flower, brian,jadin, joy, dr bob( better half also).

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  Jesus Christ

  Thanks for showing your support of me everybody!!!! Sorry I couldn't make it myself this year. Satan and I were playing video games and lost track of time.